Handling Grief

Losing someone we love is the most difficult human event that can ever happen to us. When we approach any area that is unfamiliar to us, often we experience fear. Indeed, many people reading this are afraid of losing a loved one or of their own death. Some may have already lost a loved one and are feeling the pain and fatigue of the grief losing someone inevitably brings. A few years ago I lost a very dear loved one, my father. While I was relieved that he had lived a long and good life, and that he is free from the pain of his illnesses, still, my loss feels great. But it is in no way devastating. In fact, since my father held a very strong faith in God, I am greatly comforted in the knowledge that he is with God in heaven and I will one day see him again. In the case of my father's life, he instilled an incredible faith into my life that has born fruit and will continue to bear fruit for all of eternity. This is tremendously comforting to me.

Often what intensifies grief is fear, regret, and uncertainty rather than hope and faith which help us move on. All of my life I feared losing my loved ones, but when the time came for my father to go to his heavenly home, I had a peace that only God could give. I was sad, but I had peace in my heart and I was able to say goodbye with every confidence that God knows what He is doing and that my father's appointed time had come. So the pain and sting of grief is really taken away when we place our trust and confidence in God. Sometimes our loved ones are taken suddenly and without warning. Yet still, God in His wisdom and mercy may have taken this loved one to spare him/her from a greater pain yet to come. In Isaiah 57:1 it says, The righteous perisheth, and no man layeth it to heart: and merciful men are taken away, none considering that the righteous is taken away from the evil to come. It helps us to remember that God is good all the time and His love for us never changes.

A couple of verses that have helped me through my grief and also through other difficulties in my life are found in Romans 8: 38 & 39:For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

As in every experience in life, death too, has many lessons to teach us. First, we need to take time to grieve in our own way and in our own time. Some like to be quiet, others like to be busy. I hope to carry on the work and live the faith-filled life my father instilled in me – to be kind and giving to others, to be honest and work hard, to trust and obey God. I will always share my good memories of him and even publish his memoirs. Also, my perspective of death has changed – I do not see it as an end, but a new beginning. So the many times I think of my father as gone, I also must consciously think of him as alive, just not on this earth. Still, in spite of grief, there is still so much joy to come, for that is what God is all about. The thoughts of fear, regret and sorrow are not from God, because as His Word says in 1 John 4:18, There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

There is right now Someone who loves you and longs to take you in His strong loving arms and embrace you, Someone who feels your pain and longs to heal you. His name is Jesus. He will show you how, in spite of your grief, to begin life again and He will turn your grief into indescribable joy.

If you would like to know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior and be sure that when your time comes, you will spend eternity with Him, please say this simple prayer:

Dear Jesus,

I want you to be with me during this time of grief and indeed for all of the rest of my life.  Thank You for loving me enough to lay down Your life and die for me.  I ask You now to forgive my sins and come into my heart.

In Jesus name I pray this, Amen.

If you have prayed this prayer you have taken the most important step of your life. You can be assured that He will reserve your place in heaven and always be there for you in this life and the next. All of God’s children are encouraged to read the Bible on a daily basis to get to know Him and all the many promises He has for you. As well, you may wish to attend a Bible-believing church where you will find fellowship with others who have also asked Jesus into their hearts.